Don’t even think about your first wedding. Too many brides get caught up in the idea of having everything different from the first trip down the aisle, and the result is having a wedding that may not be ‘you.’ Just make your choices based on who you are and the bond you share with your partner.

Find ways to include your children. 64% of second-time brides have children from a previous marriage, and it’s always a great idea to make the kids a part of the day. They can either walk you down the aisle, read a passage or perform a song at the ceremony, or propose a toast to you.

Don’t be bound by the old etiquette rules. You can wear a white dress, provided it’s not too poufy and virginal. You can have a big wedding, and you can toss your bouquet again.

Find a great ceremony location. 38% of second-time brides are planning outdoor or garden weddings, taking their vows out in the open. So look at those unique, original sites such as museums, yachts, wineries, and historical sites in your area.

Personalize your wedding. Your first wedding might have been your parents’ wedding, actually, so take the time now to make this event your own. Write your own vows, making promises you feel rather than those prescribed to you. Choose your own readings, and go with a theme you both love.

Spend some more money. Second weddings are often lavish affairs, as the marrying couple are older and more established in their careers. The trend now is for couples to include more exotic foods in their menus, and they’re spending a lot more on their wedding rings and honeymoons.

Give yourself away. Of course, you might still be the type to want your Daddy to walk you down the aisle, but today’s second-time bride prefers to give herself away with a solo approach.

Let the groom have a say in the plans. Today’s older groom wants to be involved, and indeed he should be. So apprise him of the planning schedule, invite his opinions, and let him share in the fun.

Choose the bridal party you really want. For your first wedding, you may have been pressured to have your sisters and cousins as your maids. This time, you’re more free to choose your friends as your top honor attendants.

Don’t let the jitters get to you! Keep the details of the day in perspective compared to the bigger picture: you’re marrying your best friend. You already know that the wedding day is just a day, and the marriage lasts a lot longer. Be confident, keep stress at bay, and know that you’re an older, wiser, more mature woman who has chosen well this time. And remember to enjoy the process!